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A Product of His Grace

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Don’t Forfeit God’s Best for Your Life

Don’t Forfeit God’s Best for Your Life

My throat tightened, but tears failed to follow. You know that old feeling…when sadness wedges itself in your throat, making it hard to breathe. It’s like a century passes before you’re able to swallow down the sorrow. Behold the sign of familiar pain—the kind that almost always lingers in the background like a pilot light.

It’s a symptom of a heart that longs, a heart that’s sick, a heart where waiting feels endless.

Forfeiting God’s Best

Ever since I can remember, I’ve run away from pain. I try to avoid it at all costs, seeking ways to maneuver about unscathed by it.

My mind flashes back to another time—a time where a little girl carried on because she couldn’t swallow the pill her mom gave her. Her legs kicking, eyes swollen with monstrous tears. She—I—didn’t want to take the pill. I knew my body needed it. I knew my mom was only trying to provide what would…

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Be Calm and Quiet My Soul

Be Calm and Quiet My Soul

Lord, my heart is not lifted up;
my eyes are not raised too high;
I do not occupy myself with things
too great and too marvelous for me.
But I have calmed and quieted my soul,
like a weaned child with its mother;
like a weaned child is my soul within me. (Psalm 131:1-2)

I read these words from Psalm 131 and immediately the claws of conviction gripped my heart. I had been spending my time in the high and lofty places where “why’s” and “what if’s” permeate the air. It’s where weary souls go to question and demand knowledge which belongs only to the sovereign God of the universe. My pride was exposed; my distrust on display.

To be honest, the future scares me. I’m well aware of the risks at hand in this season we’re walking through. Some possibilities are small…

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Four Types of People You Shouldn’t Aspire To Become

Four Types of People You Shouldn’t Aspire To Become

This article originally appeared on Whole Magazine as part of their Proverbs series. You can find it here.


A prominent theme found in the book of Proverbs is wisdom. It’s also filled from chapter to chapter with various warnings we must heed. In Proverbs 26, we see warnings against becoming four types of people.

The Fool
The Sluggard
The Quarreler
The Deceiver

Common sense (and the Bible) reminds me all of us could learn a thing or two from this chapter. I found myself convicted and I believe you may as well.

Don’t Be a Fool (Vs. 1-11)

According to Proverbs 26:11, a fool is one who returns to her foolishness again and again. She doesn’t learn from her mistakes, but rather, relishes in them. Honor is far from her (vs 1, 8) and those who link arms with her are made to be fools as well. (vs 6, 10).

Many times, a fool claims to…

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3 Reasons We Grumble

3 Reasons We Grumble

“How’s your diet going?”

Before my mind could muster up some Christianese answer like, “God is good all the time.” or “You know, it is well with my soul.” my flesh spoke for me, “It sucks and I hate my life.”

I hated typing those words as much as you probably hated reading them. Words so ungodly I feel the shame of them even now. They uncover what lingers in my heart: discontentment.

I thought about the state of my hardened heart as I watched everyone at the table eat their cake. I envied the ease of being able to eat what you desire and bear no consequence. If I would have grabbed a slice, I’d be sick later, not to mention all the other symptoms that would erupt, including those which contribute to our fertility issues. Then my mind pondered the unbelieving women who pop pills and smoke or take illicit…

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Godly Men Aren’t Looking for Debt-Free Virgins

Godly Men Aren’t Looking for Debt-Free Virgins

Clearly, I’m not the first person to address the viral article “Men Prefer Debt-Free Virgins Without Tattoos.” And I won’t be the last, I’m sure. My purpose in writing this article is not to top any of the other rebuttals or to fully break down the ridiculous statements Mrs Alexander has made. I could write many words exposing how she has elevated marriage to be the highest goal for a woman, completely disregarding single women. I could spend a whole blog post on her comment about the need for our husbands to explain the Bible to us, as if women don’t have the capacity to understand deep theology. And I could thoroughly address her twisted view of complementarianism, her legalism and how she darkens the beauty of the gospel with it.

But I want to focus in on something I’ve found missing in the conversation: Godly men aren’t looking…

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Beware the Draw of Laziness in the Midst of Suffering

Beware the Draw of Laziness in the Midst of Suffering

There’s a permanent indentation in my couch. The toll of first-trimester exhaustion from two pregnancies, as well as the miscarriages that ended them, has made its mark on our lives. That once new couch is just one evidence of it.

It’s been there from the beginning, delivered with it’s appalling “new furniture smell” as I fought off morning sickness. But as my nausea faded, along with the little life inside my womb, my body sunk deep into the fleeting comfort it provided. It comforted for a time, but as all false refuges do, it left me unsatisfied.

A Time to Mourn

As Solomon reminds us in Ecclesiastes, there’s a time and season for all things. Certainly, there’s a time to mourn and a season for healing, both emotionally and physically.

…a time to weep, and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn, and a time to dance; 
(Eccl. 3:4…

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A More Comforting Truth Than “For Your Good”

A More Comforting Truth Than “For Your Good”

I read the email explaining the fertility paperwork and a thousand emotions bubbled up from within. “This is so overwhelming. I don’t want to do this!” I lamented and tossed my phone onto the ottoman. My husband kindly reminded me, “We don’t have to.” “We do have to! I’m not ready to stop trying, but I don’t want to do this!” Tears filled my eyes and my voice raised with every word.

I retreated to the bedroom crying monstrous tears. Squeezing my eyes shut, I burrowed my face into my pillow as if to will away the pain. It’s so easy for most people. Why is it so hard for us, Lord?

That thought echoed in my mind for some time. I knew all the truths to apply and the thoughts to cast away, but can I be honest? After losing three babies back to back to back, some truths feel less…

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Dear Lord, You Can Have This Baby

Dear Lord, You Can Have This Baby

Dear Lord,

I’m unsure of how to express all that I feel, but I know you see all that resides within my heart. You see my longings and my fears, my gratitude and my restlessness. Within my heart are the questions to which you alone have the answers. Will you allow our third baby to grow? How long will this baby live? Can I emotionally survive another loss, if you so choose? You know, Lord. And that has to be enough for me. Please, help my heart to rest in you—the Creator and Sustainer of life.

Creator. You are the God who created all things. You knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you for opening my womb and creating life again where death has reigned. I praise you for this tiny life I already love so much, despite my honest and shameful efforts to not grow attached. Thank you,…

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