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Spring’s Gospel Presentation

Spring’s Gospel Presentation

Here in Ohio, we’re experiencing what we like to call “fool’s Spring.” It’s where the weather suddenly goes from wintery mix to blue skies. The warmth upon your face from the sun above might trick a fool into thinking it’s the real deal only to crush your dreams in a few days when the temperature drops again. It’s a taste of Spring, anyway, and I’m not complaining. 

It stirs my mind to ponder the little “tastes” of what heaven will be like, where flowers never fade and life reigns eternally. We see glimpses of it now in the revival of dead grass and baby bunnies due to frolic in our yard in the coming weeks. I can’t help but hear the song of redemption in the melody of the birds. New branches begin to form on desolate rose bushes and all I can think of is the power of the gospel, calling dead sinners to new life in Christ.…

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More Blessings than We Could Count

More Blessings than We Could Count

I’ve been filling my brain with a lot of World War II novels, documentaries, and movies. Probably a good idea for someone often tempted to lie awake at night making up scary scenarios in her mind. But alas, here we are.

I tend to internalize sad stories, pondering the pain of experiencing the same circumstances of others. Empathy comes easily to me, usually for the good of others but sometimes to my demise. Picture me sobbing as I tell my husband of how awful it would be if such and such happened and begging him to never die. Then picture my husband laughing at me in my ridiculousness. But seriously, what would I do if I only had a piece of bread to feed my child? How tragic would it be to see my husband and son killed and then face sudden death myself? What if we were bombed and panic ensued? …

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Bow Before the Omnipotent God

Bow Before the Omnipotent God

A couple of years ago I bought a bag of zinnia seed mix for dummies on a whim. You just sprinkle it on the soil, water, and watch. Within a few weeks, my own cut-flower garden emerged, full of bright oranges, pinks, and reds. Excited by the results, I decided I’d buy the same mix the next spring. I followed the instructions and waited…and waited…and waited. Nothing. Not a single sprout from the ground. “What’s summer without zinnias?” I said to a friend. So I tried again. Nope. Still not right. Frustrated, I bought a packet of seeds and tossed them on the flower(less) bed and prayed for at least a few blooms. 

I did get a few beauties to behold in my flower garden that year, but I imagine I’d have gotten many more if I could speak them into existence like God created the world by the power of his word.…

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Seventeen Years with a Thorn in my Stomach

Seventeen Years with a Thorn in my Stomach

I haven’t eaten Taco Bell in years. As an adult, I succumbed to the fact that my body really only ever rejected such an offering. “I’m gonna regret this,” I’d say to my high school friends when grabbing a quick burrito before practice. We all laughed. But, at some point, it wasn’t funny anymore.

I’ve suffered moderate to severe stomach pain since I was fourteen. As I write this, cramps that pulse up and down my abdomen, seemingly catching on other organs and twisting and turning make it hard to breathe. This is normal for me. And it has been for seventeen years. 

I can hear my son giggling with his daddy and I think of the many moments I miss while curled over in the bathroom. I’m weary of missed moments, of asking for prayer again, of being scared to eat, of fearing the next attack. I’m weary of chronic illness. 

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Surprised by Joy in Motherhood

Surprised by Joy in Motherhood

“Dees,” said the sweetest little voice as our son pointed out the “doggie” in his bedtime story. It’s my new favorite thing. That and a million other things he says and does. Like how he follows our amens with an adorable “anay.” Or how he reaches over to play with my sleeve or hold my finger. Even how, to show his affection for his daddy and I, he grabs our legs and goes in for a big bite. Motherhood is sweet. 

Before my husband and I began our journey into parenthood, I was thoroughly prepared for the pain and frustration that being a mom would bring. Mommy bloggers on social media preached to me that motherhood was a sort of death. Not the holy, Christlike death to our self-service that it truly is, but a death of all things easy and joyful.

They made me believe I’d hate my days at home with a little one.…

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The Gifts God Gave Me Through Recurrent Pregnancy Loss

The Gifts God Gave Me Through Recurrent Pregnancy Loss

This article was originally published on Gospel-Centered Discipleship.

It was a warm October that year. As the leaves began to boast one last time bearing auburns and oranges before falling to their death, I suspected new life. The first signs of pregnancy found their place in the smell of a far-off unlit candle and the heaviness of my eyes. One pregnancy test later and my suspicions were confirmed. But just as we lost our first baby, this one was gone too soon, as well as our third child. 

After nearly two years of walking through devastating grief on grief on grief, I was diagnosed with Recurrent Pregnancy Loss. 

It was like walking through a season of storms and steady rain. The storms are like tsunamis, threatening to overtake and drown your life in sorrow. Once the storm is hushed, you’re left with unrelenting rain—the steady undertone of sadness as you learn to live without the babies you’d hoped would be part of your life. …

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