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Looking Toward a New Due Date

Looking Toward a New Due Date

January 16th 2018.

The day our first child was due to enter the world. I realize it’s just an estimated date and they’re rarely correct, but it’s one I’ll never forget.

I’m not naive enough to expect that today would be remembered by anyone other than me. Even my husband had to be reminded. It’s not that he doesn’t care, but a due date simply isn’t ingrained into his mind. But due dates echo in the heart of a mother from the moment they’re spoken.

I’ve dreaded this week since June, not knowing what it would hold. I wondered if I’d walk into it with a womb still lacking fruit, or maybe I’d have a bump beginning to show. Little did I know, my “rainbow baby” would come and go before now, leaving me with two storms. But God has met me here today, reminding me that his goodness is triumphant and always shines through.…

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The Baby Given to the Mom Who Miscarried

The Baby Given to the Mom Who Miscarried

Many women are headed into Christmas with deep sorrow in their hearts. Some of us have arms that remain empty and others have arms less full than expected. I should be 8 months pregnant but the reality is, I just lost our second unborn child this year less than 2 months ago. I have a dear friend who was expecting a Christmas baby, but will not be meeting that sweet little, until heaven.

As choirs sing “Joy to the world!” our worlds sometimes feel crushed. But the reality is, our weariness has been interrupted by a thrill of hope–a reason for rejoicing.

Hope Between the Lines

This holiday season could very well be my most present yet. In this season of waiting, longing and mourning, my eyes are wide open. As they scan rooms and social media feeds, I’m faced with the many painful reminders of the loss of my two babies.…

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Even Now We Will Praise Him: The Story of the Children We Lost

Even Now We Will Praise Him: The Story of the Children We Lost

Not many women feel led to share the details of their miscarriages. But as I look back on these last few months, I can’t help but share when I see all that God has done. My desire is that it would shine a light on God’s goodness in our suffering and the reality of miscarriage. I also pray that God would use my words to equip women to help their friends and family who may experience pregnancy loss.


I’ll never forget all the emotions I felt that morning. I had already taken a test on Mother’s Day and saw a faint line but wrote it off as defective. But here I stood, 5 days late holding another pregnancy test. I set it down and declared not to look at it until the full 2 minutes had passed.

I paced in the living room as I waited. Would I be excited or pass out in terror of the road ahead?…

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3 Things Christian Women Need to Know About Miscarriage

3 Things Christian Women Need to Know About Miscarriage

As the fog of grief slowly begins to lift after the loss of our unborn child, I’ve finally had a chance to think through the thoughts that have circulated in my mind for months. The more clearly I see, the more urgency I feel for women to truly understand what happens in the throes of miscarriage.

Prior to experiencing this loss, I had believed many lies regarding it. And as I speak with women around me I see evidence that I’m not the only one.

With 1 in 4 pregnancies ending in miscarriage, it’s imperative that Christian women become educated regarding this heartbreaking topic.

Women need to be equipped to help those suffering miscarriage. Sooner or later, there will be a woman in your life affected by the death of their baby in the womb, and as the Body of Christ, we must know how to bear their burden with them.…

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Miscarriage: Those Little Lives Matter

Miscarriage: Those Little Lives Matter

Warning: There are some short and somewhat graphic descriptions in this article.


The world still spins. People continue to laugh together. They eat dinner with their family. Friends go get coffee. Children keep playing. But my world is tearing at the seams as the evidence of the death of my baby takes over my body and my heart shatters.

The cramping almost works as a distraction from the pain in my heart. A distraction which simultaneously works as a reminder of reality. The heartbeat I rejoiced over has faded. And only God knows his/her name. The blood is like a thorn, pricking my heart with every sight of it. “You lost your baby!” it screams. No one talks about how bad it is. No one prepares you for what it’s like to see parts of the child you longed for in the toilet or on a pad. It’s frigid and wrong, and yet there’s nothing you can do.…

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What If We’re Wrong About Anxiety?

What If We’re Wrong About Anxiety?

She was like me. Anxiety plagued her.

Not the kind that makes you nervous but the all consuming, paralyzing, depression causing beast that is true anxiety.

We had different views, she and I. I believed the root of anxiety was my sinful distrust in God. She had been told that she suffered a chemical imbalance.

But which diagnosis holds more hope?

I dare say the first one.

The Bondage of Anxiety

In scripture, we only find anxiety referred to as a sin or something to cast off and replace with trust in God. And while I do think it’s possible that a percentage of men and women may experience panic attacks due to an imbalance of some sort, the majority of sufferers may only be tending to the surface wounds of a deeper issue.

If this is so, the medications they use could be the very thing tightening the cuffs on their hands and feet, keeping them chained to the thing they hate most.…

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