“I don’t know what I’d do if anything ever happened to you.”
“Don’t you know you’re not the first woman to try to change him?”
These boringly predictable quotes came through my car speakers on the radio last week. Again, the objectification of women and distortion of God’s design for sex is promoted as this years “love” story for Valentines Day.
But it’s far from it.
Darker is Not Better
I am not writing this to change the mind of the culture. I don’t expect those outside of Christianity to agree with me. But with each Christ claiming woman I see promoting this movie, my heart aches. It aches for their indiscretion and for the watching world that sees them profess love for the Lord and then pay to see a movie that profanes his name.
Though this article is meant to get to the root issue behind the reason this movie is so popular, I have to address the obvious content.…
Right now, as you read this article, Christian women across the world are silently wrestling with lust. You might be one of them.
Clothed in shame over their failed attempts to fight on their own, they hide.
She’s the single girl who wasn’t taught correctly about purity and God’s design for sex. She’s the married mom of two, who’s struggle didn’t end when she found her husband, like she thought it would. She’s the teen with new desires. She’s the older women in the pew next to you.
And she’s in desperate need of help before it’s too late.
Truly, it’s an epidemic.
This epidemic of women pretending like lust doesn’t exist in all of our lives. We walk around as if we have fully eluded its grip, unscathed.
But most of us, if not all, haven’t.
The Reality of Lust Among Christian Women
Out of all of the articles I’ve written, one has stuck out as most popular by a landslide.…
I laid there, anxiously awaiting the morning and the events to come. Soon, I would put on my button up shirt and comfy shorts, just like they told me. I’d sit in a room with some of the dearest women to my heart, as curls were strategically placed in my hair. I’d rest my eyes as my friend brushed shimmery colors upon my eyelids.
And then, I’d slip on that dress. The one I had longed to wear all my life.
I can’t even begin to explain the load of emotions I felt that night and the next day. If I could sum them up in just one word it would be…redemption.
Only years before, I could have been named among Gomer and the adulterous woman. I was a slave to sin who lacked the desire for freedom. My body and heart were not places of purity, but rather, tools to get what I wanted; to feel loved–even for just a moment.…
Lately, my Pinterest feed has been flooded with bra-less, stomach-baring, booty short-wearing young women. Pictures neatly pinned to the “My Style” board of so many teens and young-20’s, showing the world what their ideal style is.
And my heart breaks.
Before the Lord saved me, I could have been one of those gals in the pictures. In fact, I was. I’m the first to admit that my clothing choices before Christ were quite promiscuous. This lined up perfectly with my heart that was equally immoral.
The way I dressed displayed what resided in my heart: A deep desire to be noticed, sought out and viewed as “sexy” by men. In a word, sensuality.
And it ruled my heart.
What Rules Your Heart?
The Bible doesn’t have a ton to say about modesty and there definitely aren’t any specific rules. This makes it a hard topic to approach. Since God is sovereign over his Word, he must have done this for a reason.…
Have you ever been scared of your own sin? I’m talking “heart skips a beat, shame fills your head, despair in your stomach” kind of scared. A sinful thought that appears to come out of no man’s land enters your mind, breaks your weak heart, and off you go into a spiral of doubt.
“I’m a Christian, how could I even think of something like that?!”
“What if I’m not saved?”
“What if I do that?!”
I can’t tell you how many times this has been my life story. Pain has gripped my heart when I’ve been confronted with the evil of which I’m capable. And there I sit, wallowing in the guilt of one single thought that wasn’t even pondered. Most of the time, it isn’t even something I’ve ever wanted. But the fact that it came into my mind consumes me from morning until night. A constant nagging in my ear…”I’m disgusting!”
Can we all just take a moment and raise our hands and say, “I think wicked thoughts.” If you didn’t hypothetically raise your hand, I think you might be lying to yourself.…
I haven’t shied away from sharing my failures before Christ saved me and even after. Not in a spirit of boasting but rather in humility, recognizing where I came from. If you’ve been around me for long, you probably know I was held captive to lust and sexual immorality for many years. By God’s grace many of my struggles with sexual sin ended quickly once he placed a new heart in my chest. But there was one besetting sin which seemed so very impossible to conquer.
Even as a brand new Christian, I caught on to the fact that this wasn’t something you talk about. At least, that’s the impression I got.
I felt hopeless.
I felt disgusting.
I felt alone.
For many months, I believed the only reason I struggled was because of my promiscuous past. As I journeyed in the faith and began speaking with other women about the issue of lust, I realized I was mistaken.…